Probably because of what I do every day,
people ask me how do you become a life
coach or a motivational speaker? I'll
break it down for you today. I'm a
professional psychologist, I'm a past
president of the National Speakers
Association. I'm a professional speaker
that's why I have some opinions about
this. Let's start with 7 clarities
that will be absolutely essential as you
take a look at this question - how do I
become a life coach, a motivational
speaker. I think I can help you with that.
We got to get clear about a few things.
Clarity number 1 - why would people
listen to you? Now this is not a
confrontive question. It's simply one
that I invite you to think about. Why
would people listen to you? You got to
have some answers to that. If you don't,
how can you expect them to have a clear
answer about why they should listen to
you? This is one of the first things that
you get to consider as you think about
going this particular direction. You want
to take the stage, you want to take the
mic, you want to sit down with someone
and possibly even a high-paying coaching
situation, why would they listen to you?
So this gets down to expertise,
experience, what knowledge you have, your
skill sets, all of these become the why.
One of my colleagues, Ty Bennett, tells a
funny story about traveling on an
airplane and he's kind of casual. He's up
in first class but he's casually dressed.
A woman next to him asks him - traveling
for business or pleasure? He says "Oh,
business," Really? What kind of work do you
do? I'm a keynote speaker and then she
responded with - "why would anyone listen
to you?" He tells this story because it's
such a compelling example of why we all
need to think about this question. And
without getting defensive, just work on
answering. Why would they listen you? I
love Ty's answer to it. Says because I'm
amazing. That's the kind of confidence
we're looking for. Let's get a good
answer and become
about the why. Clarity number 2 - get
clear about the who you get to speak to.
Who do you want to speak to? Who do you
want to work with? Who do you want to
coach? And here's the thing that we run
into all the time. Some of my licensees
have come up with this. I just want to
help everybody Dr. Paul. Okay, awesome and
as long as you want to help everybody,
you're not going to help anybody. That's far
too broad. You get a pick a lane. You need
to focus in first on those people who
can uniquely benefit from the skillset
and the knowledge and the why that we
already talked about in clarity number
1. Calrity number two you get clear
about the who. Who is your audience? What
do they look like? What are their pain
points? What is it that they're looking
for? What do they need? What do they want?
This is your audience. Your tribe so to
speak. Seth Godin nailed this in his book
"Tribes". You might want to take a look at
it. It's a quick read and it's really
clear about this audience that is
uniquely yours. It's your tribe and you
get to be the chief of this tribe. If you
don't show up and lead them, nobody will.
You got to get clear about who your
tribe is. You're not going to please
everyone and this is a thick skin that
we have to develop sometimes as thought
leaders or as speakers or as coaches.
Because not everybody loves us. You just
scroll through some of the comments on
my YouTube channel. You're going to see some
of them. This coach doesn't know what he's
talking about. But there's others that
say - "oh, Dr. Paul, thank you so much for
what you've done for me here on your
channel. There's all kinds people and as
long as you're trying to please
everybody, you're not gonna please
anybody.
So get clear about the who. Number 3 -
get clear about the what. Meaning your
topic. What is it? Again here when I train
new licensees, I have someone come into
my licensing program or they get some
coaching from me about establishing
their
coaching or speaking practice and I
asked them well who do you want to talk
to? Oh everybody. Well, what do you want to
accomplish? I just want to help people.
Could we be more vague?
I don't think so. How do you want to help
people? With what? Get clear about that
what. It's just like the who. We want to
pick a lane. We want to have a topic, a
field of expertise and do you have to be
the expert? No, you have to be an expert
in that particular field. If you're not
an expert, what business do you have
coaching people in that area? So what if
it's happiness or peace or mental health
or how to fix a washing machine or
whatever it is? Do you have expertise in
that area so that you can actually
establish the what. Here's how I'm going
to help people.
Now I threw out the part about how to
fix a washing machine. I have repaired
now four major appliances in my home. I'm
a psychologist but I have coaches, okay?
And when I'm looking for someone to help
me fix my dryer, I'm not looking for Mr.
motivational you can do it sort of a
speaker. I'm looking for the guy who
knows how to fix a dryer and quite
frankly, I don't care how good of a
speaker he is as long as he can present
his ideas in a way that I can understand
and put me a YouTube video for that, I'm
good to go.
What is your topic and it's okay if it's
something as specific as how to fix a
gas dryer? That's fine. In fact, in a lot
of ways that's better because you can
define your audience a little more
clearly and you'll get there a lot more
quickly. Now, little caveat a lot of
people who want to go into life coaching,
motivational speaking, they want to help
everybody with everything. Okay, I get it
because I've been there. I still struggle
with that a little bit. Picking a lane
actually helps you to broaden your
audience later on. Because as you do a
good job for your little niche audience,
they start to talk to and spread that
out to other people, other industries,
other groups ,other populations. So that
you can
your message to other audiences at some
point but you're starting with this kind
of niche market. These are my people. This
is what I talked to them about and how I
help them. That leads us to number 4.
Clarity about when. Is now the right time?
I keep referring to my licensees. I've
got about 10 people right now who are
going through my program to become
professional speakers or certified
coaches. Some of them don't yet have the
depth or breadth of experience that
allows them to do that well. So they may
choose instead of now to do it after
they've engaged in any kind of
particularly experience for a while. The
classic example is school. I went to
graduate school to get a PhD in clinical
psychology. I wanted to help people
before I went to shrink school but I
decided that wasn't the right when for
me. I wanted to pause some of what I plan
to do eventually in order to go get
myself that experience. So it might be
experience or schooling or education or
certification or just giving yourself
more time to clarify the what like we
talked about in the last point. Get clear
about the when is now the right time and
if so that's great if not what's next in
order to get you to the point where it
will be time. Now let's get practical for
a moment. The next clarity is clarity
about where. This might sound kind of
silly to even mention but a lot of
people don't think about this. Where are
you going to do what you want to do? You
want to be a public speaker? You want to
be a motivational speaker? Where do you
want to speak because there's a big
difference between taking the stage at a
major event for a corporation or an
association compared to taking the stage
at a local service club. They're both
legitimate venues and legitimate wares.
You approach them very differently and
of the conversations and the
relationships. You might also give some
thought to - if I want to do personal
coaching, do I have an office? I have here
a professional office. We typically film
Live on Purpose TV here at my office.
This is where I sit and consult with my
clients and they do the coaching that
I've sometimes referenced here on the
channel. This is my where. But I've also
got a closet over there that has all of
my podcasting equipment which doubles
really nicely as a virtual office. So I
get to have zoom meetings or Skype
meetings with some of my clients who are
not in reach of my physical office. This
is part of your becoming clear about the
where. Two more. Number 6 - get clear
about the how. This is where you want to
develop the actual skill sets that will
allow you not only to do some effective
coaching or speaking. So you've got to
have platform, skills and you have to
have programs and processes that people
can engage in. That's all part of it.It's
also putting the personal development
practices into place to keep you sharp.
Having a mastermind group, having a plan
for ongoing education or certification
or training. All of those contribute to
clarity about the how. How am I going to
actually do this and then the last one. I
like to throw this one in especially to
keep us straight on the path that will
help us to ethically and in a morally
correct way, really create value for
people. There are always limits and
ethics. So this final clarity is about
the limits and the ethics to what it is
that you're doing. To be a professional
speaker for example, you want to have
your own stories. You hear me share
stories. You'll hear other speakers
sharing stories. You even heard me share
some of my colleagues' stories here on
today's video. You want to have your own
stories that you can tell. Now can it be
a story about a colleague? Well, sure it
can if you know them and if you have a
connection with them and if you give proper
attribution. But you never own it as your
story. Your stories are the things that
have happened to you and the way that
you have experienced your life so that
you can illustrate the principles. Now
you're going to hear awesome stories
from other speakers. Do not steal them. It
is a form of plagiarism or piracy to
steal someone else's story. You don't
want to do that. So get clear about the
ethics. The other thing that I mentioned
is limits. Ethics and limits. There are
limits to what you can do. I for example,
I'm a licensed psychologist. I have a
professional degree and the license that
allows me to diagnose and treat and
create prevention programs for mental
illnesses. That's what I'm licensed to do.
I can do therapy, I can do assessment and
testing. Now you might want to do some
life coaching. There are limits to what
you can do as a life coach as opposed to
if you're a psychologist or a therapist
or a counselor. Just get clear about what
those limits are because if you practice
outside of your area of expertise or
skill or licensure, you can not only get
into a whole lot of trouble
ethically and legally, but you can also
do some damage out there when what you
really want to do is create some value
for some people. Let's get clear about
all 7 of those areas. And then the
practical part that comes after that is
much easier because of the clarity. Not
everybody is interested in this kind of
an application but if you are, you might
want to follow up with me. I've got a
website liveonpurpose.coach, where
you can learn more.
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