(audience clapping and cheering)
[Kim Vopni] Yeah, so we are talking about this stuff today.
Here we go.
Okay.
Yeah, so, yeah we definitely don't talk about this enough
and people come and talk to me in private
but they don't... they don't act on it.
So that's probably one of the biggest messages
that I want you to take away today.
You've probably had many different types of coaches in your business
but have you had a Vagina Coach?
(audience laughing and cheering)
So now you can hashtag that all you like.
#vaginacoach
So....it's not something that,
you know, people have been talking today about vision and...
I can't say that I had this vision
that I was going to be talking about pelvic health
and preaching it to the world on a stage like this when I was a little girl.
But now if we have daughters you can tell them it's a viable career option.
(audience laughing) Become a Pelvic Health Evangelist.
So, we're going to talk about the pelvic floor
and how you can optimize it in your work day
and how that will make you a better mompreneur.
So, this is the pelvic floor.
It's a big one and so... (audience laughing)
What we're talking about is
at the bottom, which is the foundation, which Adriana talked about,
the foundation is key.
Our core has a foundation and it's the pelvic floor.
So it attaches to the pubic bone in the front,
the tailbone in the back.
So it provides support and stability for our spine and our pelvis.
It also plays a role in holding our internal organs up in place.
So we have a bladder, a uterus and a rectum.
Oh wait, I have a disclaimer. Not really a disclaimer but...
Yes, this is mainly talking about vaginas
but men who are in the room, you have pelvic floors, as well.
We will have different cues when we talk about how to activate your pelvic floor,
but you don't just have to have a vagina, so...(audience laughing).
So they hold our bladder, our uterus, our rectum up in place.
It's kind of important.
It plays a role in our sphincter control.
So it helps us decide:
Do I have to pee? Do I have to poo? Do I have to fart?
Is it okay if I pee, poo or fart right now?
(audience laughing) So we need to have good
pelvic floor muscles to help us make those decisions.
It's really key in decision-making.
It also plays a role in our sexual satisfaction or
lack there-of.
So for something that is so important
and so integral to so many parts of our lives,
why is it that nobody does anything about it
or talks about or pays any attention to it?
So it's something that when things are working well,
we don't really give it too much thought.
But when things aren't working well,
it becomes one of the only things we can think about
because it's so central to what we do.
And in our business
we want to have confidence.
We don't need to be distracted by leaky bladders
or organs that aren't in place.
Or maybe we don't have satisfying sex with our partner
and then that causes a drain on us
and then that influences our business as well.
So what if paid attention to our pelvic floor?
What would that do to our business?
The other thing that I'll talk about is,
kegels are, if you've ever heard anything about pelvic floor,
because women typically don't get told these things.
But if you have been told something,
it's "Go home and do your kegels."
You deserve better than just, "Go home and do your kegels."
What is a kegel?
Kegel's like, oh you have to squeeze your vagina.
Kind of. But it's a little bit more than that.
And most people do them wrong.
Most women do kegels incorrectly.
So Cosmo Magazine says you're supposed to sit in a chair, sorry, sit in a car.
At every red light you're supposed to do your kegels.
So women are...
"They don't work. They suck. Okay, well I've tried kegels."
Well, the position of your pelvis actually matters
when you're doing your kegels.
So, if you're not in the right position to start out with, they're not going to work.
But kegels or pelvic floor muscle exercise,
they do work if you do them,
if you do them correctly and if you do them consistently.
Sounds similar to our business, right?
As mompreneurs, we're really good at
paying attention to our family
and paying attention to our business
but we're not good very good at paying attention to ourselves.
So some of the SOS signals that our pelvic floor is probably sending to us,
that we're doing a really good at just being like,
"No, I'm good. I'm good."
Pain.
Leaking.
Urgency.
Feeling like something's falling out.
Difficulty starting the flow of urine.
Constipation. Can't hold a tampon in.
Sex sucks.
Those are all some of,
those are just some of the signals.
The biggest one I hear is leaking.
Or "I have to go to the bathroom all the time."
That kind of sucks, don't you think, in your day
when you have to wear pads,
you have to decide, "Should I go to that meeting?
Am I going to be able to make it to that meeting?
Am I going to be able to sit through that whole meeting
without having to get up and go to the bathroom?
Okay, well I'm actually just not going to drink all day,
and then maybe I won't leak or maybe I won't have to go to the bathroom."
So these are all strategies that we're using
but unbeknownst to us,
they're actually making the situation worse.
Pelvic organ prolapse is another one.
When you have your organs that are starting to fall into
and eventually out of your vagina,
it's not comfortable.
It certainly is a bit of a hit on your confidence level.
How is that affecting your relationships?
How is that affecting your business?
And then sex. If you're not having sex,
first of all, sex is really good exercise for your pelvic floor.
Orgasm especially is really, really good.
But if you're not having sex and not having pleasurable sex,
that's interfering with your relationships,
which then also interferes with your supports and your business.
So it's time to start treating your pelvic floor like your business
because it is your business.
So in our business, we know
we can't do everything ourselves.
We try at the beginning.
We try to do everything until we make a little bit of extra money
and then maybe we can get something to do something for us.
But I urge you
to make an investment in your pelvic health
and outsource to an expert.
Pelvic health physiotherapists are the most underused
pelvic health resource that we have.
We don't need a referral.
There's many of them in every major city,
smaller ones maybe not so much but...
Make an appointment
and go get one of the most
unbelievable pieces of education
about your body you probably have ever had.
And you'll walk out of there and say,
"Why has nobody told me about this before?"
And then your job will be to tell every other woman that you know,
"You need to go see a pelvic floor physiotherapist."
And if you're sitting in the audience and you think,
"I don't have any problems. I don't leak.
I don't have to go the bathroom all the time. I'm good."
You still have a vagina.
And most of us in here have had children.
So every women, especially a woman who's had a child,
needs to see a pelvic floor physiotherapist and do it annually.
It's a part of the body we can't see.
And I wear these weird muscle pants
to try to point out muscles
and I'm not going to show you right in there, but...
(audience laughing)
But there is a part of the body that we can't see.
We don't, we have a disconnection there,
especially after having children.
So we need some help.
We need to outsource to the experts
because we can't do everything ourselves.
Now everybody has to push their chairs back
because now is where the health break,
like where you actually have to do a little bit of movement comes in.
So we also have probably been in jobs
where we have felt underappreciated.
Maybe we felt like we weren't in the right position
and we weren't able to do our jobs correctly.
Maybe in our businesses we have had people working for us
and we have promoted them and we have put them in a role
where they could have been able to shine.
The pelvic floor is no different.
In this picture,
this is one of the most common postures I see
in women.
So in the picture on the left,
she has sort of a flat bum,
her pants are all kind of crinkly,
her tummy is a little bit further forward.
All I've done with her is change the position of her pelvis.
She now has a rounder, more bountiful booty.
She also has a flatter abdomen.
Can you see her abdomen in relation to that leg structure?
Nothing else has changed except the position of her pelvis.
Her pelvic floor can't do its job when it's here.
It can't do its job
when it's here at every red light driving.
Okay? So the position of the pelvis is important.
So let's promote our pelvis to a new position.
Let's let it shine and do its job.
So come forward to the edge of your chair.
(audience moving)
And I want you to sit on your sitz bones.
I have skeleton pants too that actually show you the sitz bones,
but I didn't wear those ones today.
Okay, so reach under, grab your butt cheek,
pry it apart and find those bones,
those two bones in your bum. (audience laughing)
Okay, sit on those.
Those are called "sitz bones".
Ischial tuberosity is in fact the fancy word, but sitz bones.
So sit on your sitz bones.
You should also have an awareness of your perineum,
which is basically between your vagina and your anus.
Okay? So you're kind of going to feel a little bit of your vulva.
This woman here, she's like, "Oh my god!
What is she saying!?"
(audience laughing)
You're going to sit on your perineum and your two sitz bones.
You're not going to sit on your tailbone.
Okay? Now I want you to take a breath in.
(inhaling)
Okay?
Now, I want you to just slouch and tuck.
Tuck your pelvis under, sit on that tailbone.
And now take another breath (inhaling).
So many of you did this (sharp inhale).
To get a breath in, you kind of had to lift up to get that breath in.
When you're sitting on your tailbone,
your breath can't come in properly.
Your pelvic floor can't respond.
Your abdomen sort of shuts down.
So from here forward,
you're going to be sitting on your sitz bones.
Now, take a hand on your side ribs,
another hand on your belly.
This is incredibly hard for women to do.
I'm going to ask you to take a breath in.
I want you to breath into your bra straps so your ribs go wide
and I also want you to let your abdomen go (gasp)!
(audience laughing) Women are like, "Oh! No!"
Women are really good at sucking in,
especially when they see, you know, somebody attractive and like, "Hey!"
(audience laughing) So when we are sucking in all day long,
our pelvic floor and our organs are starting to descend.
It's not good. We don't want that.
Our abs might look, you know, great while we're walking by somebody,
but at the end of the day, our foundation is falling apart.
So stop sucking in. So you have to let it go.
So everybody take a breath in (inhaling)
and let it go into your rib cage and let your belly expand.
And then exhale.
And bring then your awareness to your perineum.
As you take your breath in, you should feel your pelvic floor expand
and blossom into your chair.
(audience laughing)
It gets better, hold on! (increased laughter)
We're just starting, we're just starting. Okay.
[audience member] God help the chairs!
[Kim] So now, you take a breath in.
You're going to inhale and expand.
Expand in the ribs. Expand in the belly.
Expand in the pelvic floor.
Now when you exhale,
purse your lips and blow.
And I mean these lips, not these lips.
(audience laughing)
You're going to purse your lips and blow,
like you're blowing out a candle.
And then, see it's still getting better.
I want you to think about picking up a blueberry
with your vagina and your anus.
(audience laughing) Okay, I'll walk you through it. Ready?
Inhale and expand (inhaling).
Purse your lips.
Pick up your blueberries.
Inhale... Put the blueberries down...
in one piece. (audience laughing)
Blueberries need to come down as a whole blueberry,
not as blueberry juice, okay? (audience laughing)
Most people, when they think about their pelvic floor,
they think about squeezing the heck out of it
and holding it and holding it
and holding it and holding it.
It's not about that. It's a gentle contraction
and it's actually a lift up.
Remember all those organs that we're trying to hold up in place?
Just by squeezing everything together and usually using your inner thighs
or your butt muscles to do it is not going to help us here.
We need a contraction and a lift.
A jellyfish is another image you can apply.
So as I take a breath in, my jellyfish is soft and open.
And as I exhale, my jellyfish propels up to the surface of the ocean.
Or, try this one. Everybody inhale and expand (inhaling).
Purse your lips and blow.
Sip a milkshake through a straw with your vagina.
(audience laughing)
Okay? Now let it go.
Now, there is no best cue in terms of activating your pelvic floor.
It's what's best for you.
What do you connect with?
I like blueberries. Maybe you guys like milkshakes.
(audience laughing)
Now, so kegels, the other thing about kegels is,
if you do them and maybe they feel a little bit effective now and then,
but it's an isometric exercise
where you're sitting in one place.
We might be sitting in one place right now, but most of the time,
especially with our children, we are up moving around.
And that's often when leaking happens,
when we're standing up from a chair,
when we pick up our child,
when we exercise.
So we need the pelvic floor to work while we're moving.
So you're forward at the edge of your chair.
Now you're going to take an inhalation again.
You're going to exhale and sip milkshakes
or pick up blueberries and then you're going to stand up.
Okay, ready? Inhale and expand (inhaling).
Exhale, pick up your blueberries and stand up off the chair.
Okay. So now you're in standing mode.
Okay? And now the same thing has to apply.
We have to find a good pelvic position while we're standing, as well.
So...
I want you to bring your awareness to your perineum.
And your perineum should be over the space between your ankles,
while you're standing...okay?
You're feet should be pelvis width apart.
And this is another thing that women are really good at.
Oh pelvic floor, okay. Or you just say hip width and then they go way out here.
Your hips aren't that big.
So find your pelvis
and that's where you should be standing,
pelvis width apart.
The perineum is over the space between your ankles.
And now, blossom your butt cheeks.
We as women... Blossom? Yeah, blossom.
(audience laughing) Yes, I said blossom. Okay.
We as women, especially after we've had children,
end up here,
where I'm pushing my pelvic floor
because that was the strategy I used when I was pregnant
to prevent myself from tipping forward.
And now my body thinks that's normal.
And I'm not in a -
I'm in a position here to be able to stabilize myself,
but when I'm here,
I have to use other strategies like my bum muscles.
And those get really, really tight over time.
So now when I'm backing my pelvis up,
I still am tucked under here.
So now I have to blossom my butt cheeks
and let that tension go
so my pelvic floor has an opportunity to respond.
Muscles like to be at a certain length.
If I walk around like this all day,
my biceps get really tired,
they get really tight,
they can't do their job effectively.
They can't - there's not much room left to contract.
My pelvic floor is no different.
If I'm standing here contracting and tight all day long
and I cough or I laugh or I jump or I sneeze,
my pelvic floor doesn't have much more to give.
Does that make sense?
So you want to back it up here and put it back in its resting length
so it can respond to those pressures that we have.
Okay, so now you're going to sit back down.
Hold on! Don't do it yet.
When you sit down,
I want you to inhale and expand and let your blueberries go,
as you're sitting down.
Okay? Inhale and expand (inhaling).
Exhale...now women also,
especially if you're wearing a skirt,
women are really good at...
tucking themselves, tucking their clothes underneath them
and then sitting back down onto their tailbone.
But we just talked about promoting our pelvis to a new position.
So when you sit down, you're going to almost flip your skirt up
and moon the person behind you
(audience laughing) and sit back down on your sitz bones.
Okay, now do it. Okay, inhale and expand (inhaling).
Moon your partner behind you.
And sit back down.
Okay. (audience chatting, laughing)
So, getting up and down in a chair is kind of like a squat.
So next time you go to an exercise class
and you're doing some squats,
you're going to inhale, let the blueberries go.
Exhale, pick them up.
Inhale, let them go.
Exhale, pick them up. Okay?
It can go for bicep curls.
When I exert my force and I,
I do my bicep curl,
if I pick up blueberries just before I've done that,
I've now turned that into a pelvic floor exercise,
a core exercise, not just my biceps.
So you don't have to do kegels, nor should you,
at every red light in your car.
Does that make sense? Okay.
And finally, we know in our business,
Elaine, you tell us this every meeting...
write it down.
Schedule it.
What you write down happens.
When you schedule it, things get done.
So, make an appointment with your pelvic floor physiotherapist.
On my website PelvienneWellness.com
there is "Find a Physio" page where you have...what?
[Maria Locker] I'm saying good!
[K] Okay. [M] Thank you for saying where the heck...
[K] (laughing) [M]....Pelvienne...
[K] Find a physio. They're across Canada.
And then send it to your girlfriends and tell them to go as well.
Make an appointment. You don't need a referral.
Schedule it. Do it.
Do it every single year, even if you have no symptoms.
So scheduling gets done.
Kegeling right, gets done. Okay. (audience laughing)
So if it was for our family,
we would pay attention, we would make sacrifices,
we would do whatever needs to be done.
If it was for our business,
we would pay attention, we would make sacrifices,
we would do whatever it takes to make it happen and get it done.
Now you need to take that same philosophy
and apply it to yourself
and especially to your pelvic health.
So, prioritizing your pelvic floor health
will give you freedom in your business.
You won't have to wear pads anymore.
You won't have to be thinking about,
"Can I make it through this meeting?
Wait, now I have to drive here. Are there bathrooms along the way?"
Okay? It gives your freedom. It gives you confidence.
When you have confidence, you can focus on the task at hand,
rather than on your leaking
or your prolapse or
the fact that you haven't had satisfying sex in a while.
It will also improve your sex life.
[Audience Member] Woo hoo!
[K] So a good functional pelvic floor will react better to sex.
It won't hurt.
You can orgasm properly.
It'll change your life. It'll change your relationships.
It will change your business.
It will make you a better mom, a better partner,
a better colleague, a better entrepreneur
and it will make you a better mompreneur.
Pelvic floor wellness...
(audience cheering and clapping)
[Maria] So you know when you looked up and said, "Oh my gosh..."
So that's all my very traditional Italian family...(audience laughing)
My mom, they might see us, and my....
you know, hi everybody! (audience laughing).
Meanwhile, they're probably like, "Oh geez."
We don't talk about this stuff. (audience laughing)
But I want to say thank you to Kim.
That is not an easy job.
Good for you because holy geez.
(audience clapping and cheering)
You gotta love what you do, right?
No matter what it is. So thank you, Kim!
(audience cheering and clapping)
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