Hi guys!
This topic has been the most requested thing on my channel for long time
so today I will be talking about self-esteem and mostly how I got confidence to start dressing like this
I get many messages daily where people are asking me how they could start expressing oneself
by dressing alternativety when they're are afraid what other people will think about them
The topic started to interest me so I asked my Instagram followers
that do they dress like they want without caring what other people think
And I was suprised to get so many answers and it was interesting to notice that
most of my followers don't let other people opinions define their style
but there also was many comments from people who would have love to represent alternative fashion style
I noticed that most of the people who were insecure about it were 12-16 years old
And I kinda understand why, because in primary school its so hard to stand out
and its so easy to star bully someone just because they might look little different than others
Just because they might not dress like other students
I was also being bullied for all my primary school time
mostly because I didnt dress like others
And it started when I was 10 years old and I fell in love with gothic style
and on that time Japanese streetfashion had came to Finland
and I used to adore all older students who had cool or cute alternative style
and I wanted to be just like them
So I started slowly dressing like that and I was still 10 years old
On that time my style was mostly all pink-black clothes with skulls and beanies with cute cat ears
but for that reason I also started to receive mental and physical violence
just because I didn't dress like other students
Even thought it was hard and I got so much hate, I didin't stop dressing like that
I didn't want to be 'normal' again just because other people didnt like me
That style was so important for me and I loved to express myself like that
It just made me so happy
However I used to think for many years that I had earned all that hate
because it was my own fault that I didn't want to be like others
and when I think about it now.. Its was so stupid and still that I used to think like that
When I finally got out of primary school I was afraid to move on to college
because I thought I'd not get any friends because of the way I looked
that I people would start to beat me up again
However..
When I staterd the new school I noticed that people didn't care about my looks anymore
I think in that age people are just so busy minding about their own life
so they don't really care if someone looks little bit different than others
However it took me many years to grow my self-esteem back
because I had received so much hate for so long
Think about it.. In that age kids are really sensitive
and if they get negative comments everyday
they will start to think that there's something wrong with them
And..
I feel so bad that I actually used to think that I was not good enough just because other people said so
However. Even thought I had started to get my self-esteem back
there was still something I was afraid to do
Dress cutely and wear pastel colors
All my life I had dressed mostly in black and red
or sometimes black and pink
So.. It felt so hard to start dressing pastel colors, even thought I wanted to do it so badly
On that time fairy kei fashion had landed to Finland
and I was so jealous for all those people who had cute pastel clothes and I wanted to be like them
But.. I didn't enough courage because I was worried about other people's opinions
Overall it took me about three years to finally start to dress in pastels in public
And some of you might remember that when I started my YouTube channel
I didn't wear any pastels and I tried to dress really neutrally
because I was afraid of all that negative feedback I could get
When I started to finally had enough courage to dress like this
I was really suprised that mostly all feedback I got I was positive
Of course there's always some people who comments that I should dress normally
or people who think that colors have gender and that boys should't wear pink
Which is ridiculous!
Because really, colors do not have gender
I believe that there are many people that don't really understand why I dress like this
Because it might seem weird that I have these elf ears, bandaids and wigs
and I mostly use pastel pink
So people usually asks me ''Why are you doing that? You look so creepy!'''
and the answer is that I love to look like this
and its really imporart for me to represent myself like this
and I don't want to change myself just because some people think that I look ''creepy''
In my option self-esteem develops when you can be truly and proudly yourself
and I believe that society has changed since I was kid
and people are nowdays more open-minded.
I want to encourage all of you to represent your style
I want you to dress like you want
and I want that you get to be yourself
without caring about other people think about you
There's one thing I'd have wanted to learn earlier
When somebody comments your style in positive or negative way
usually there's something in your style that awakens their interest
So maybe that person who comments your style
hopes that they would have enough courage as you do
However now I have a question for you
Do you have enough courage to be who you want?
I really hope that even someone, who's struggling
with their self-esteem or own style
I would also want to hear your opinion about this topic
so free feel to leave comments below
But before we end this video...
I noticed sometime ago that hey we have hit 10K
This channel has already 10 000 subscribers
and for me its really huge thing!
Some of you might remember that on January 2018
I still had about 700 subscribers
When I started my YouTube channel I used to make
videos only for 200 subscribers for long time
And now it feels so unreal that there's
so many people who have subscribed my channel
I'm just so thankful for all of you!
Of course I will be doing 10K special video
and I would like to hear what kind of video
you would like to see.
Anyway
happy new year for all of you
I hope you enjoyed this video
put thumbs up, subscribe the channel
I hopefully we see again on next video!
Bye bye!

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