cat: their neck is.. too much
that looks like ben platt when he's cry-singing, you know?
this is going horribly
the resolution is bad (crunching in the background)
(crunch)
luca: AH AH EULALALA EULALALA
cat: was that your teeth??
luca: (whimper)
cat: luca!!! luca: it was in my mouth
it was in my mouth!
ooh there's bits still in my mouth
cat: LUCA
adrian: hewwo? hewwo?
cat: HEWWO? luca: hewwo
adrian: hewwo?
cat: HEWWO???
luca: there's bits of colored pencil in my mouth
cat: (strained) now the real fun will.. begin
see, look! she's happy from being mean-spirited!
jude: oh mood
luca: that sounds like a bad person!
cat: see okay she got the other girl angry but she's not angry she's happy
adrian: what a meanie
cat: it be like that sometimes
adrian: it do
luca: DAVE
DON'T CALL ME WUCA PLEASE
cat: oh my god they can fight
jude: jude
jude can't use the uwu
...juwude
(everyone laughs)
luca: juwude?
jude: (snorts)
god
oh no (laughs)
juwude (snorts)
cat: oh my god jude: juwude juwude
cat: oh my god
oh my god
oh my got adrian: oh no
oh no
jude: what's happening
cat: they're getting into a fight
cat: shit did vriska lose? wait
jude: did vriska just lose? cat: VRISKA LOST
jude: oh my god
jude: (laughing) juwude
cat: ahana? is that her name? ahana is evil, though
jude: oh my god she just got in a fight with an evil person
they're perfect for eachother! they should be best friends!
cat: well she wants to livestream a game
oh wow this is so meta you guys
TTS: luca said juwude
(things falling) adrian: fuck
jude: vriska needs to become a livestreamer
who just broke things?
adrian: uh me. sorry
i broke my desk it's broken it's in half
cat: oh! jude: are you okay? do you need help i'll come over with duct tape
adrian: aw sorry i broke my legs...
jude: ok well i said i'd come over with duct tape
you don't need to come over here
(crunch)
adrian: CRUNCH? jude: i don't need any crunching ASMR right now
cat: is that a pencil?
luca: it got in my mouth again
cat: lucaaaa
luca: yeees?
cat: did you just eat a pencil?? jude: stop it!
luca: maybe...
jude: oh my god
i'm getting you a new doctor
luca: well my mom didn't know about so you'll have to tell my mom
jude: i'm telling your mom
luca: please don't tell my mom
jude: i'm telling your mom
luca: pwease don't
jude: i'm calling her
luca: pff what's her phone number, you fool?
jude: 1-800-MOM
luca: oh dang you got it! got it in one!
luca: i ha- don't!
that's a bad nickname!
i see that nickname now!
adrian: which one?
luca: your nickname!
adrian: oh, nut?
luca: YEAH
luca: hey who gave dave the role of beefucker
adrian: it was most certainly NOT me
dave: (scream laughs) WAIT WHAT?
dave: whoever gave me that role- cat: wait i love this
luca: i did not dave: no! i want that!
dave: i want that
dave: who gave me this role???
adrian: we are all beefucker
dave: is this gonna be a thing? luca, am i gonna have a war with you again?
luca: the world wide web
jude: the world wide web
luca: the wuh wuh wuh
jude: wait i need to find that world wide web- luca: IS THAT WHAT WWW STANDS FOR??
(wheeze laugh)
luca: oh my god
cat: weed
luca: does it?
cat: YES! adrian: YES!!
luca: oh my god...
oh my god...
ooh.. ooh..
oh my god
oh my gosh
adrian: welcome to the world
i bet you feel so enlightened
luca: i do! i love it
cat: oh my god!
i hate that!
OH MY GOD THEY'RE GONNA- you guys they're gonna fuck in the coffin
guys guys they're gonna fuck in the coffin you guys
adrian: i beg your pardon?
luca: i can't see it cat: theyre gonna fuck.
in the coffin.
adrian: delicious
jude: i don't like that cat: and kanaya's gonna watch!
adrian: hey whatever floats her boat
dave: lemon
luca: i'm trying to keep that image away from my beautiful, beautiful eyes
cat: hold on?
hold on?
lemme get the perfect angle
of this dangle
(everyone laughs because i am the comedy master)
and kanaya is just standing right here
jude: kanayaaaa
luca: WHY ARE THERE GHOSTS COMING OUT
cat: it's bats
jude: oh my god kanaya luca: ooooh it's bats
jude: kanaya's like "okay i know something's going on behind me but i don't know what it is"
luca: bye daaave i love you
jude: byeeee
adrian: bwye jude: love you dave luca: i wuv you
jude: we love you adrian: heart noise
luca&cat: heart noise? adrian: you know
jude: thump thump
cat: less than threeee adrian: you know, thump thump
cat: oh she's thirsty
haha get it?
luca: uh yeah we do adrian: aren't we all
cat: alright. are people awake now?
can she like drink from someone please?
TTS: sparkling heart jude sparkling heart said what if cats had legs
cat: they- haha i have some great news for you, buddy
TTS: muffin man said soup.
soup? soup! soup,,
soup soup soup soup soup drinky it up
cat: oh my god look where i paused it stop
TTS: seers said oh sluop? slurp. cat: everyone shut up and
look at porrim
adrian: okay
jude: oh my god porrim has red fucking eyes
cat: yeah
luca: i.. i just spit all over myself
TTS: muffin man said nut. my son. we've been concned. we want you to be okay. cat: sally ate her parents and other supernatural tales for kids got 21 simoleons
TTS: say something. please. wake up cat: when saying sorry isn't enough got 19 simoleons
cat: sammy makes the worst mistake got 17 simoleons TTS: seers said laultulateluteleatle?
cat: del milverstein got 6 simoleons
luck. isn't. real... got 55 simoleons
eat ass got 156 simoleons
skate fast got 104 simoleons
TTS: seers said eat ass skate fuck eat ass skate fuck eat ass skate fuck eat ass skate fuck eat ass skate fuck
luca: seers
seers you're a comedic genius i love you
adrian: is that karket?
cat: yeah that was karkit
adrian: oh, wow!
adrian: (grumbly voice) hey i'm karkit
cat: that's a FLAWLESS karket voice TTS: seers said i hate this
cat: thank you seers
TTS: sparkling heart jude sparkling heart said ker ket
adrian: im going to start my own uh reading
of of homestuck i'm gonna post it all on youtube
just all going to be my voice
and none of you can stop me
cat: oh my god i would love that actually
luca: ??- and i would very much like to support you in your endeavors
jude: i would love that
adrian: thank you so much
jude: i'll reblog it all
cat: she's watching romance
TTS: seers said why do you sound exactly like octopimp
octonut
luca: seers i love you
seers
seers you're great
cat: this is romance
now that's what i call romance!
jude: now that's what i call romance
luca: that's what i call friendship
jude: oh my god i love it
(i have no idea what either of them said right here)
luca:haha oh my god
they're eating each other's faces
jude: chomp chomp
i love the crunch
adrian: chomp chomp i love the crunch of your face luca: no! no!
no we already got past face eating!
must we circle back
cat: now she's gonna read...... sooomething
luca: they died???
luca: you just left us on a cliffhanger they died!
adrian: THIS IS FUCKING BULLSHIT TURN THE TV BACK ON
cat: i didn't tell her to turn it off she turned it off
cat: alright guys you know what it's time for?
luca: for you to shut up!
cat: no!
it's time for rose to have another baby!
jude: ooh my godd luca: CARROT CARROT
CARROT PLEASE PLEASE adrian: i wanna name it i wanna name it
cat: adrian is gonna name it- ADRIAN IS GONNA NAME IT AND THAT'S FINAL
TTS: seers said 4 13 pm blaze
luca: no! carrot! jude: carrot!
luca: you said! you said we would get a carrot
jude: we would be carrot
luca: you have to promise us
luca: the carrot! cat: oh my god spiders needs to leave
luca: and to fulfill your promise of carrot
jude: yeah! has to be carrot!
luca: carrot
cat: i'm not naming their child carrot!
luca: pleeease! cat: no! luca: we did a poll
and one of the winners was carrot!
jude: yeah
adrian: can i- jude: we did a whole poll
cat: what's-- what do you want to name it?
adrian: see, i-i think that
carrot isn't that great of an idea. now hear me out...
luca: (gasp)
adrian: i understand that carrot is--is long overdue
but i think i came up with a great name
luca: what is it? adrian: hear me out
adrian: the name is steven universe.
cat: (scream laughing) jude: i don't like it
luca: no i don't like it!
adrian: you name-- you name the child Steven Universe Maryam
jude: (whispering) i don't like it
luca: (directly into mic) I WANT CARROT
jude: (into mic) give me carrot or give me death
cat: oh oh! they fucking
luca: GIVE ME CARROT OR KILL ME IN MY SLEEP
jude: give me carrot or run me over with a bus
luca: give me carrot or murder me in cold blood
cat: okay i'll murder you in cold blood, then
luca: DO IT I DARE YOU
cat: alright
TTS: seers said stevens university miriam cat: rose is taking a pregnancy test
luca: seers, but what about carrot?!
TTS: luca said carrot
luca: i hate how it's not saying nasty boy
TTS: muffin man said karrot, carrot, crtot, yummy
luca: i would also accept crtot but i would like carrot
TTS: sparkling heart jude sparkling heart said carrot
TTS: sparkling heart jude sparkling heart said carrot
luca: it's not school time! it's a--
cat: ROSE IS PREGNAAAAAANT
cat: UUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHH
KANAYA???
TTS: it's good. it's lovely.
luca: no i want carrot!
jude: i want carrot and-- cat: KANAYA??
luca: carrot is-- cat: EXCUSE ME??
jude: why is kanaya naked?
cat: (screeching)
cat: (inaudibly) i don't know!
jude: why is kanaya naked and on the computer and thinking about aliens?
adrian: for fun
luca: i mean that's my daily routine
jude: i don't know about you but that's literally what i do all the time
adrian: hi! i'm adrian! i'm gonna eat a candle!
luca: you don't know how nasty i am
adrian: well, if you really wanna be nasty
you should probably start eating nut
jude: no leave him alone!
luca: i am not going to eat that. that's a bad eat
adrian: i mean, yeah, it probably doesn't taste good, but
it's nasty!
luca: it doesn't chunch! but it doesn't chunch.
adrian: it doesn't chunch? i have a better idea: fermented nut
jude: oh my god, wait
cat: freeze-dried nut
luca: i don't know what that means adrian: freeze-dried nut!
cat: DIP N DOTS MADE OF NUT
luca: hey i don't know what that means
cat: THE NUT OF THE FUTURE!!!
adrian: i would not send my my beloved um ashley: shlong?
adrian: dicktures pictures
cat: (wheeze) adrian: in this chat
luca: wh haha hah what?
ashley: excuse me?
cat: (more wheezing)
luca: can you repeat what you just said please?
ashley: is it not what we were talking about?
???: what don't you wanna know?
cat: that's not very neighborly!
sorry kanaya
ashley: what is going on are you talking about your penis wenis?
ashley: oh damara with that sassy hip shake!
cat: why, my penis wenis, of course :)
ashley: why, my penis wenis
ashley: hey i have a question why does kankri look like a small boy
cat: cause he is
ashley: ooh go take this outside, bitch!
damara with these sassy hip shakes!
cat: i know i love her so much
ashley: she's VERY ANGRY
luca: hey nut, i know you can't hear this, but my stomach is making noises right now
adrian: what you don't like these beautiful pictures of my face? (???) you binch!
luca: no i just keep thinking about that one--????? ashley: oh shit!
oh shit! wait there's so much drama!
oh fuck!
adrian: oh, drama?
cat: MITUNA: GLAD WE GOT A CHANCE TO CHAT!
ashley: can we talk about how at one point kankri was straight up punching air?
cat: and damara lost!
damara lost, though
ashley: i like how they're just staring at each other like "hm"
"so that was a thing"
jude: damara let kankri win cause kankri was gonna talk about it for the rest of the week
cat: so my computer is very sick
luca: can i give it some medicine?
ashley: have you tried turning it on and off again?
cat: i'm gonna give it some medicine by restarting the game
adrian: not in the hardrive
cat: what?
adrian: not in the hardrive, you heard me
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