Sabrina is a flower crown wearing queen!
♪♫♬
I shit ya not, fangirls; when I say this book has all of the things, I mean all the things!
Bickering acquaintances, friends to lovers, alpha girl/beta boy...
Opposites attract, unrequited hero love, a marriage of convenience, a dastardly stalker!
That's right, I said dastardly! The trope gods have blessed our asses with this OTP.
Our heroine's fuckboy stalker has Mr. Hero playing bodyguard.
Edwin has crushed on Clarissa for years, which is cute & understandable.
♪♪ Understandable, understandable, comprehensible...♪♪ I'm sorry, I'll quit.
I say that because I fell for gal on page 2! And guys, I hadn't even met the woman yet!
It isn't as if she hates you.
No, indeed. She only challenges my every remark, ignores my advice, and tweaks my nose incessantly.
The last time I saw her, she called me the Blackborough Bear,
and said I belonged in the Tower of London menagerie, where ordinary people could be spared my growls.
[laughs] Bless that darling!
No those weren't her words, but the gal's spunk owned me. Woman snatched my swoons!
Feisty Clarissa is an extroverted social butterfly.
The party chick had brain-smarts that made my ass swoon sideways.
She's a fun dichotomy; a nerd who isn't shy & loves people.
Yes, give me that complexity, I approve! Newsflash, not all nerds are wallflowers.
Clarissa's nuanced because she defies the shit out of the usual heroine cliches.
Woman gets to be lively & witty, while our hero...? Well, he's the exact opposite.
This nerdy Darcy is an awkward duck around other humans.
But the icing on the romance cake?
The pup ain't just awestruck over Clarissa's strengths, he is 1 million percent self-aware!
I envy you your ability to navigate society when I am so very bad at it.
I am looking for a wife, you know.
And finding one would be much easier if I didn't insult women every time I opened my mouth.
Oh, be still my beta-loving heart! A hero who ain't an arrogant butt munch? [squeaks]
Pretty sure that's like finding a peacock in Antarctica. Get it 'cause...cock?
I don't know where I was going with that.
If that weren't cracktastic enough, this OTP playfully tease each other.
And every time, firecracker Clarissa makes logical, restrained Edwin lose his smexy chill!
[Giggles] So they get married. Ok I'm lying...well, half lying.
They really marry 'cause a stalker got gal needing protection.
But unlike overprotective douche heroes, Edwin never badgers Clarissa into marrying him.
This man gives credence to Clarissa's issues regarding intimacy!
Panties meet hero! He's all, "We can do the sex, not do the sex. Live together, live apart."
Boy not picky. Boy just wants to marry so they can save each other.
And he does all of that whilst secretly rocking his epic horny pants.
"We should do something fun in the outdoors."
How he hoped that her idea of fun and his were the same, but somehow he doubted it.
"What did you have in mind? Swimming?"
Naked preferably. "Going for a drive?" To somewhere they could be naked!
"Riding?" Please let it be riding! But not on a horse, and definitely naked.
[laughs] Bless sextastic OTPs, & bless this one doubly so!
Here is the point where our lil book goes from fun to art!
Clarissa's a survivor of rape & she is understandably traumatized.
Guys, this is handled so well, I cannot emphasis that enough.
Like, the hero's penis ain't a magic cure-all potion!
Instead, our heroine recovers by talking about her past with Edwin. Oh & trigger avoidance therapy!
[kisses book] God bless you!
Prior to this, our couple's lack of communication makes up most of the internal conflict.
Edwin thinks Clarissa's No Go For Launch with the sex cause he's shit at it.
Clarissa thinks if she tells Edwin why she's No Go For Launch with the sex, he'll think she's shit.
Guess what, both are wrong! This is all of my crack, people!
The book's subject matter was compelling without being a torture read.
Sabrina wrote realistic sexual assault consequences without Clarissa internally demonizing sex.
[claps] 'Cause ya know, the 2 aren't mutually exclusive.
If that was just all the book did, I would fangirl from here to eternity.
But that's not all the book did! Our OTP get a healthy, hot sex life! And 2 specific scenes nearly ended me.
One was the ovary-exploding theater make out scene!
The other? That carriage ride, with the hero asking of the kissing of the no-no bits!
Satan open yo' arms 'cause a bitch gonna jump right in!
Side tangent, I don't actually believe that, you know, sex is sinful. It was for a joke!
I may be Southern raised, & I may be a Kentuckian but [laughs] I'm not a moron.
Aside from swoony sexy scenes, Sabrina also stole my heart.
The woman high key squeezed my organ with 1 sentence; one sentence!
Her mouth was a revelation, showing him the difference between merely desiring a woman's body,
and desiring her mind and her soul.
[squawks] Pardon me while I backflip flail into the sun!
I swear, this author goddess can get the biggest reactions out of me over the smallest shit.
Like, Hero Face asking to kiss Clarissa's arm...right here!
My ovaries did cartwheels!
Now while I love all that cute crap, the writing is what sold this story.
Our heroine's trauma is not a plot device. It effects her character but it does not define it.
Likewise Edwin's personal baggage & trust issues aren't background noise.
All this personal drama paired with the book's plot means you get gold!
The internal conflict & the romantic layers were a direct punch to my reproductive organs.
Guys, I sat staring at the blinking cursor while I was writing this script, trying to come up with a criticism.
Just any bad thing to say about it. I mean I'm a picky ass bitch. It don't take nothing to make me go grumptastic.
But guys, I got nothing. Like I said, this woman is an author goddess.
And like any true believer, well...
I pledge allegiance to Sabrina Jeffries, & to the quality for which she stands.
One fangirl, under goddess, indivisible, with happiness & cash money for her! [fart noise]
I have been reading Sabrina Jeffries since...(2010) I've read her for a long ass time.
And the way she can do characters & get inside their heads, & make me feel feels, it's just, oh! It's great!
This book is so good, guys. It's one of those books where, yeah there's a background bad guy,
but the plot is mostly just these 2 people being friends.
To half the people on the planet, I swear to God that sounds like the most boring ass thing they've ever heard.
Yet my fangirl ass hears it & I'm like, "Yes, this is the song of my people!"
Usually I feel bad for how annoying I am in these videos.
But Sabrina makes me so happy, I don't give a damn.
I think I even wrote a RITA nomination Smart Bitches Trashy Books review for this.
So I know it's been at least, like, 12 billion years since I read this thing, & yet the fangirl feelings are still that real.
If you've read this, tell me what you thought, if you haven't read it,
then read it & then tell me what you thought.
I've reviewed 1 other Sabrina Jeffries book on this channel.
And if the fangirling I did in that video didn't freak her out,
then I'm pretty sure my blasphemous Pledge of Allegiance did.
You'd think I'd have enough shame not to post this on the internet. [laughs] You'd think wrong. [ding]
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