Are you an overthinker too?
I've got five tips for you that are going to help you master the chatter and finally
be able to meditate, are you ready for this?
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Tara Wagner: Hey, boss lady, I'm Tara Wagner, your breakthrough coach helping you to get
it done, but feel great doing it.
In this video I want to talk to you about meditation for overthinkers.
Oh my goodness, I so get it.
I struggle with the same thing.
When I was first sitting down to meditate, my mind was all over the place.
Mostly back and forth all over my to-do list, but you get the drift.
I was really at a point where I was thinking that there was just no way, my brain wasn't
cut out for this, I'm a fast thinker, I'm always thinking, I'm always in creative mode,
there's way that I can shut my brain off to be able to sit and meditate, right?
Tara Wagner: Then, I had a lovely little smackdown from the swami who love to give smackdowns,
who basically told me that I was missing the whole point.
Meditation is not for people who are not thinking, meditation is for people who are overthinking,
that's the entire purpose of learning how to meditate.
If you feel like you can't do this, and it's not possible for you, that's exactly what
meditation is for.
I'm going to walk you through five tips that I've discovered, and that were given to me
as well, that have helped me to really be able to master this thing, to be able to shut
my mind down, to be able to learn how to meditate over time.
Tara Wagner: Now, here's the thing, this is not going to be easy in the beginning, you've
got to understand that.
That you're not going to be able to just stop thinking, you're a human being, your brain
is supposed to be thinking all the time.
I don't want you to feel like you can't do this if you can't do it right away.
The truth is, most people who get to the point of not thinking, have been practicing meditation
for, I don't know, like decades.
If that's not your goal, you can still get some great benefits from meditating, even
if you are an overthinker.
You just need to know how to do it in a way that's not going to drive you bat-bleep crazy.
Am I right?
Tara Wagner: Let's jump in with tip number one.
Tip number one is to be comfortable.
I used to think that I had to sit cross-legged, in a lotus position, with my hands out, and
that was the right way to meditate.
The truth to the matter is the right way to meditate is whatever you need to do to make
sure that you can sit comfortably and meditate without being distracted.
For me, I choose a comfortable chair that's cushioned, I put my feet on the floor, I close
my eyes, and I just sit comfortably.
I'm upright, but I am not too stiff.
Sometimes, I'll even lay down and be able to meditate.
Tara Wagner: Now, the problem with that is you run the risk of falling asleep.
Usually when I'm doing this, I am doing at night, so that if I fall asleep, it's no big
deal.
If you have a hard time sitting comfortably, I recommend that you do some things for your
body ahead of time.
Maybe you're doing some stretching, maybe you're going for a walk, whatever it is that
you need to do to just feel good and be able to sit still longer.
This is actually how yoga came to be.
It used to really just be about meditation until some people were like, "Hey, I'm having
a hard time sitting for five hours at a time in order to meditate."
They were like, "Here, try some stretches first."
Then, yoga turned into what it is today.
It doesn't matter how you sit, it matters that you sit.
Choose a place and a space that's comfortable for your booty, and plop it down.
Tara Wagner: Tip number two is to keep it short and simple.
The longer you try to sit, the harder it's going to be to not think.
You don't have to sit there for 30 minutes to an hour in order to call it meditation.
Three minutes is long enough, especially in the beginning.
As you start with three minutes, as you get really good at that, you'll slowly be able
to add more time to it and you'll want to add more time to it.
But if you keep it short and simple in the beginning, you're going to have very little
resistance to it.
Your brain is not going to tell you, "Oh, we can't do this.
It's too much time.
We can't sit there that long.
We don't have the time for it."
You're going to have no resistance whatsoever.
Everybody can make time for three minutes.
So start small, start simple, and keep it easy for yourself in the beginning.
Tara Wagner: Tip number three is to commit to the same time every day.
The reason for this is that you're trying to ingrain a habit into your brain.
If your brain gets into the habit of getting up in the morning, going to the bathroom,
brushing your teeth and then sitting down for three minutes, it starts to become such
an ingrained habit that pretty soon you can't go without it.
Otherwise you'll feel like something is missing.
That's what you're going for.
Choose the same time every single day.
Tara Wagner: Now, in terms of the best time, really the best time is when you're not going
to be disturbed.
This is going to be different for everybody, however I will say this is why most yogees
will meditate between 4:00 and 5:00 a.m., the reason being is that there's less pulls
on their energy, the whole world is asleep, you're not thinking about what's going on
in Facebook, or what emails you have to answer.
You're able to really give yourself permission to just be still, because you don't have things
pulling you in million different directions, you don't have the energy of the world awake
and vibrating around you, so you can really sit and focus better.
Tara Wagner: However, 4:00 or 5:00 a.m. might not work for you, and that's okay, choose
a time that does when you're going to be undisturbed.
Whether that is first thing in the morning, or before you go to bed, or three minutes
in the car before you walk back into the house.
All of those are totally okay.
What matters the most is that it is consistent, and it's the same time every single day, so
that you can really ingrain that habit.
Tara Wagner: Tip number four is to use grounding oils.
I really like the essential oils of frankincense and sandalwood for meditation.
Sandalwood especially, because it really calms the system down.
I will use these over my pre-frontal cortex, this is the thinking, worrying part of your
brain, it's doing all the planning for tomorrow, the part that won't shut off, that's right
here.
I'll also put it on the back of my neck.
This is right over the brain stem, and again, it helps to just settle your nervous system
and your body so that you can calm down a little bit better and be able to meditate
a little bit longer.
Tara Wagner: I also did a video not too long ago about an oil called Console.
Console actually includes frankincense and sandalwood in it.
It's usually used for things like grief, but it is amazing for meditation as well.
Be sure to check out that video, I'll link it above as well as in the description below.
Tara Wagner: Tip number five is to stop trying to stop thinking.
Again, you are a human being.
Your brain is going to go.
The whole purpose of meditation is to not stop your thinking, the purpose of meditation
is to learn how to separate yourself from your thoughts, to be able to observe them
so that you can better question them, and so that they don't carry you away.
In fact, an analogy that's used a lot and that I love and have found really, really
powerful in my meditation is to think of your thoughts as something floating down the river.
Tara Wagner: If I notice myself in meditation getting washed away with my thoughts, I'm
thinking about my to-do list, I'm thinking about something that happened earlier in the
morning, I will stop and notice them as though they're objects in a river.
I'll watch them go by.
I'll actually visualize myself stepping out of the river, watching my thoughts go by.
Then I'll turn my attention back to my breath.
Tara Wagner: Now, again, it is normal to have to do this over and over and over again, like
literally every two or three seconds.
Don't get frustrated.
That is the purpose of meditation is to do this over and over, and over again.
Because as you do it, you're ingraining that habit into your brain of, "Hey, I don't need
to get carried away with these thoughts.
I'm the observer of these thoughts, I can question these thoughts, these thoughts are
not in control of me."
Tara Wagner: Now, one tool that can help you to do this is using a guided meditation.
However, I have found that a lot of guided meditations are actually guided visualizations,
which is not helping you to train yourself to separate from your thoughts.
I really don't like those, but I have found a guided meditation that I love.
The reason that I love it is that it's actually four meditations in one.
There's a three-minute meditation, a seven-minute, an 11-minute and a 30-minute.
This way you can start simple, and as you get really good at that three-minute, you
can start practicing the seven-minute, and so on.
Tara Wagner: Also, the reason that I love this is because it's a true guided meditation.
It's guiding you on how to slow down your thoughts, or to observe your thoughts, and
in every single one of those meditations, it has quiet space.
No sound, no visualizations, just you with your breath.
But before you get there, it guides you on how to use that time so that by the time you
get to that quiet part in the meditation, you actually know what you're doing.
This is a really powerful meditation.
I highly recommend it.
I'm going to put a link to it in the description below.
Definitely check that one out.
Tara Wagner: All right.
Now you know how to start a meditation practice as an overthinker, but here's why I want to
give a little plug for my free Self-Care in Seconds training.
A lot of times we find it hard to sit down and meditate because we feel that we don't
have time.
This training will teach you how to find the time, how to prioritize the time, and how
to maintain the habits that will allow you to constantly fill your cup, meet your own
needs, and feel good enough to actually run your business and live your life.
Tara Wagner: It also includes tons and tons of other self-care ideas that you can squeeze
in in as little as 30 seconds.
So literally, you have no more excuses for not taking good care of yourself.
You can download your free Self-Care in Seconds training with the link in the description
below.
All right, now I want to hear from you, what tips have you used to help you to meditate?
Leave your ideas and any questions you have in the comment section below.
And don't forget to download your free Self-Care in Seconds training.
And if you found this video helpful, please give me a like, share it with your boss lady
friends, and in your favorite Facebook groups.
And don't forget to subscribe and hit the bell for notifications of new weekly videos
that I put out on mindset, productivity, and emotional wellness to help you crush your
goals, not your soul.
Tara Wagner: Thank you so much for watching, and I will see you next time.
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