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*Pop*
Woot!
*Video game start sound*
What in your life would you do, that you're not currently doing, if fear or insecurity
or anxiety weren't holding you back?
If anything was possible?
If the voices of your doubters or that little voice in your head telling you that you can't
or that you're not good enough, didn't exist?
Believe it or not, that idea is more than an inspiring, 5 minute Casey Neistat video.
It's real.
I've done things that people have considered to be "brave" a few times in my life.
At the age of just 17, I left everything and everyone I ever loved and with only a few
hundred dollars in my pocket and moved to a city where I knew literally no one in order
to pursue a dream.
It failed miserably.
But my life was completely changed.
I literally wouldn't be the person I currently am, doing what I am currently doing, had I
not done that.
At the age of 23 I held my breath with anticipation as I clicked the "upload" button for the
first time, awaiting judgment from the internet for my very own youtube channel.
The art, my art, myself, my creativity that had never been good enough was on the table
and I was terrified.
Actually every upload to this day is clouded with thoughts like "this isn't even good."
"Thyey're not going to like it."
"Why am I even trying?"
But I upload anyway.
And because I upload anyway, have friends I could have literally never had and I have
a community of people who for some reason like what I make and they route me on every
single time I press that upload button.
They give me a sense of purpose and community.
You might think, wow Crystal you're confident and independent and secure.
No!
The truth is, I'm not.
I'm fearful, I'm dependent on encouragement from people like my husband, and I'm insecure
in almost everything I do.
If anything, I'm very determined.
Fun fact about me, determination is the driving force behind everything that I am and everything
that I do.
I will reach my goals.
I won't let the words of everyone who said "You're not good enough" "You're helpless."
"You will always give up when it's too hard because you're incapable" I'm not going
to let that dictate the results of my life.
I won't let them win.
Being brave is acting in spite of those voices, in spite of that fear and using your determination
to propel you into your fullest potential.
And in just 30 days, with the 30 days of brave challenge, my determination helped me conquer
one of my longest standing fears.
My body.
So what the heck is the 30 days of brave challenge anyway?
Every day for 30 days, you're going to get an email in your inbox with some daily inspiration
and a 5 minute activity that will help you achieve your goal.
It can be something as big as starting a youtube channel or talking confidently in front of
a group of people.
Or as small as getting better at drawing, or coding, or music.
All you have do to do that, is make the decision to be just a little bit more brave than you
were yesterday and take back what your fear and insecurity has tried to take from you.
So I'm sure you're then asking yourself "What are you so afraid of doing Crystal?
What was your 30 day challenge?"
Time for some backstory: between the ages of 13 to 14m I went from 5''6'' to
5'11'' in like, 3 months.
I then was extremely skinny to the point that most people assumed I was anorexic.
Couple that with debilitating social anxiety and an affiliation for things most people
considered to be "weird" and you then get the nick name "Ugly Freak" and some
really bad posture.
Even after a few years, when I finally grew into myself and started modeling, that insecurity
never went away.
The pressure that comes with modeling, of always being perfect and sexy and skinny was
overwhelming and it wasn't long before I found myself over a toilet trying to get rid
of lunch with the words "ugly freak" echoing in my head.
And to this day, I thank God that I was not physically able to do it.
I had to give up.
I couldn't make myself throw up.
After giving up, I just sat on the cold floor thinking "What am I doing?"
I've always felt like a foreigner in my own body.
So when I found about about the 30 days of brave challenge, I wanted to take my body
back and do the one thing I've always been too afraid to do, pole dancing.
Understandably, before your judgement gets all up in the comments, Pole dancing get's
a bad rep, I know that.
But what a lot of people don't know is that it is an art form similar to that of contemporary
dance and it is a sport.
It takes some serious strength and confidence and grace and emotional vulnerability.
I do not deny in any way that it can totally be used for sexy type purposes but it can
also be more than that if you want it to be.
And once I completed my 30 day challenge, took the dive, and walked into that class,
I actually found out that at any given moment when pole dancing, there is not one muscle
in your body that is not doing something.
I also discovered at any given moment when pole dancing, I am smiling like a complete
idiot.
Even if I did look like a salmon.
The whole way to the class, I was nervous and worried that this whole video actually
was going to be a mistake.
What were people going to say?
What were people going to think of me?
Of my past?
Of what I'm doing?
Of pole dancing?
But then I remembered what I learned over these last 30 days.
I am capable.
I am present.
I am committed.
and I am inspired.
I've worked for this moment and I'm going to back down.
All of that other stuff was my insecurity talking.
And I did things I never thought I would be physically able to do.
I surprised myself and It was so worth it.
I want to give a huge shout out to the people who put together the 30 days of brave challenge
for sponsoring this video and inspiring me to do something I would have never have done
other wise.
And now, guys, it's your turn.
Take just 2 minutes to sign up for the completely free challenge in the link down below and
you will be joining myself and thousands of others in kicking life in the face and being
just a little bit more awesome thank you were yesterday.
And then leave a comment with how you're going to be brave in the next 30 days.
I would love to see you guys working towards your goals so please feel free to take video
and photos and stuff, post them on any social media of your choosing and tag me @thecrystaljoy
and use the hashtag #30daysofbravechallenge so I can find you and see your progress.
Honestly, if I can do it, you can do it.
If you enjoyed this video, please do me a huge favor and subscribe by clicking my face
down in the corner for more videos like this and like other stuff.
Like this video, be sure to comment down below with how you're going to be brave, and share
this with everybody so everybody can be brave together.
My name is Crystal.
Stay awesome.
Bye.
I got my, uh, ninja turtle shorts.
So I'm ready...for the sexy.
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